


He Looks At His Life And What It Has Shown Him

by hamiltonhearts



Series: Good Guys Gone Bad [10]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Dark Character, Dark Past, Graphic Violence, M/M, Murder, Past Character Death, Reflection, Serial Killers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 04:04:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15134717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamiltonhearts/pseuds/hamiltonhearts
Summary: Alexander decided to clean out his closet and he finds the darkest part of his past in a shoe box. A past that included murder, blue sharpies and the unwanted spotlight.





	He Looks At His Life And What It Has Shown Him

**Author's Note:**

> we haven't had Bad Guy Lafayette yet :) ugh lots of articles in this shit im sorry. also! a quick translation: je suis désolé = i am sorry.
> 
> The title is from Sniper by Harry Chapin !!

Alexander Hamilton often didn't like to live in the past. Though on a rare day he did take off from work, he decided to clean the shared apartment. He shared the space with his long-term boyfriend, Thomas Jefferson. He decided that if he wasn't working, he should at least be doing something productive with his time.

He found the old shoe box. One that he knew he shouldn't open, but decided to anyway. He lifted up the old newspaper that was right on top and read the headline:

> **_"The French Executioner" Strikes Again-- Only This Time It's A Thirteen Year Old Girl_ **
> 
> _August 1st, 2006    11:43 AM EST_

Alexander sighed at the old article that reminded him of his past-- one that he didn't even tell Thomas about. He never told the southerner that he had originally been born as Alexis Faucette. He didn't tell Thomas because it wasn't important now. It was old news.

The killer's signature, something that made his killings so unique, was that he brought along a cheap sharpie to each killing. Once he had killed them, he scribbled a blue patch onto the victim's skin. then, he'd make a bunch of thin cuts on the right side of the ink, with space in between. To put it simply if a picture is not being drawn, it was a crude version of the French flag on a dead person's skin.

Only, instead of stopping his quest through the box, Alex kept going. He found a photo of him in the gun store with the handgun he had just bought. Lafayette had actually taken the picture, which made Alexander laugh darkly. On that day, Alexander decided to prove himself as American, bu doing what else? Of course, he got a gun.

He saw another article, one that read as said:

> **_Twenty Five Victims Now For TFE; When Does It Stop?_ **
> 
> _December 13th, 2006   12:54 PM EST_

Alexander didn't even bother reading the article. He just read the headline and he put it off to the side and continued to dig further and further into the deepest part of his life.

Next, he grabbed a white rope bracelet with a few lines on crimson red on it. He held it as if it was the most sacred thing in the entire world. He stared at the smears of blood on it; to think that the blood belongs to Lafayette. He quickly put it down, not wanting to think about how he caused that blood to be there.

The thing about The Executioner was that he spared no one. Once he met them and got the feeling to kill, the instinct, the drive-- they were already dead. No one would ever know what truly went on in his mind; not even his boyfriend. The only time Alex saw the serial killer in Lafayette was during those very few seconds before he shot him.

Soon, an urge to get to the bottom of the box his Alex hard. He disregarded all the other mementoes in the red and black shoe box and found the article at the very bottom. It was carefully folded up and the headline read:

> **_The French Executioner Killed By His Boyfriend?!_ **
> 
> _March 25th 2008   9:24 AM EST_

Only this time, Alexander began to actually read the admittedly quite short article,

> _The French Executioner, sometimes known simply as TFE, has been found shot dead in his apartment early this morning. Neighbours were woken up by three quick gunshots and seconds later, supposed boyfriend Alexis Faucette called 911. Faucette commented briefly on the murder, and he is claiming self-defense. He says, "I saw him come home, he was covered in blood. It was three in the morning and I guess he supposed I was asleep. I thought he had been picking up night shifts at his job... He had the knife in his hand and he rushed towards to me. I knew it was either him or me."_
> 
> _Faucette must go to trial, as he's facing possibly twenty-five years in prison if found guilty of second degree murder, as a firearm was used. Though, it will be incredibly hard to find an unbiased jury of Faucette's peers. Faucette's lawyer, the esteemed Aaron Burr, is working against the clock, as the judge has denied a motion for continuance and a motion for a change of venue, shocking all in court. Burr volunteered to take this case, and he's doing it for little to no pay._
> 
> _Many people of Manhattan are calling Faucette 'the hero they all needed' as NYPD were nowhere close to finding the serial killer who terrorized this city for years. Though, Faucette doesn't like being called a hero for killing The French Executioner. He wishes he "...could have just called the cops and had them take him away."_
> 
> _We will just have to wait and see the outcome of the trial, and see if Alexis Faucette really was a hero, or if he followed in his boyfriend's murderous footsteps._

Alexander scoffed at the last line. He understood that the trial had to take place. He wishes he didn't have to go through with the whole trial, but there's no way in hell he would have to plead guilty or even no contest, as he didn't want to accept any charges for a crime he had to commit to saving himself.

He did end up getting a verdict of not guilty, but he was incredibly overwhelmed with the spotlight on him now. He had Aaron Burr help him in court with getting his name changed; he took a name similar to Alexis, and with the name Alexander, most people end up calling him Alex still anyway. Though, he did take his dad's last name, as he couldn't keep his original name anymore. It was too original with it's spelling and lots of people across the nation knew his last name.

So, he changed it and moved down to the capital: Washington DC. He had to get away from all the questions. But, luckily, there he got a job as a Virginian senator's aide. No one asked questions. And there, he met Thomas. Though he started thinking, and that didn't end well in regards to this case.

But, Alexander couldn't help but fan the spark of curiosity in his chest, thinking about the case now. If it was still talked about; if people wondered about Alexis Faucette; if there were other victims. So, Alexander jumped up, leaving papers and photographs and other little mementoes around the closet floor and rushed for his office.

He went on his computer and typed in three words: The French Executioner.

Immediately, hundreds of pictures of Lafayette came up, some with Alexis next to him. Even some fan pages, as every serial killer had obsessed fans. Luckily for Alex, he changed quite a bit since the late 2000's. He grew his hair out a lot, as it was now a little past shoulder length. But, for the most parts, there were a lot of articles and news reports.

Alexander looked at some titles, and one stuck out to him a lot:

> **_How Did TFE's Boyfriend Know He Was The Infamous Killer?_ **
> 
> _June 25th 2018   5:07 PM EST_
> 
>  
> 
> _One question was asked throughout the country back in 2008; how did Alexis Faucette know that his boyfriend was The French Executioner? If the young man saw his boyfriend covered in blood, with a knife in hand, was there any time to ask? Any time for Lafayette to confirm if he was the killer? The death left the country with more questions than answers._
> 
> _Though, Alexis Faucette has seemingly dropped off the face of the Earth. Many suspected a name change happened shortly after a not guilty verdict was reached in the trial of Lafayette's death. Here are the five most commonly asked questions that we do know the answers to:_
> 
> **_What's with the name: The French Executioner?_ **
> 
> _Lafayette was dubbed as The French Executioner due to the harsh marks he made on his victims, resemballing a French flag on their skin; blue with a cheap sharpie that could be bought anywhere, and a collection of cuts. The middle, white part of the "flag" was left blank, as their skin colour would represent that part. Once his death came about, it was revealed that he immigrated from France when he was sixeen._
> 
> **_How many victims?_ **
> 
> _TFE killed twenty-seven people, and his youngest victim was a thirteen-year-old girl._
> 
> **_How did he kill them?_ **
> 
> _He slit their throats, hitting the carotid artery. He also made identical slits on both the victim's wrists. He often put his "flag" on their abdomen area._
> 
> **_Why didn't NYPD catch him?_ **
> 
> _TFE was free for over 2 years, killing left and right. He was quick. He spent no time really with his victims. He would be over and done with in five minutes. He was about effiency and he had a pattern. He knew what he was doing and how to get away with it._
> 
> **_How didn't the boyfriend know?_ **
> 
> _Alexis Faucette, the boyfriend thrown into the nation's spotlight, claims that Lafayette had always committed the murders when he was asleep. He also stated that they started dating in 2004, when Faucette was twenty four. That means they started dating before the first murder took place. Though, we are still wondering how he knew. S_ _o, Alexis, if you're out there, just know we're still wondering about the murders. What happened in the early morning of March 25th, 2008?_

But oh, Alexander knew Lafayette was the serial killer that had put the whole state on edge. He found locked away in a drawer a full box with blue sharpies, which was weird because he had never seen Lafayette use blue sharpies before. He also had a collection of cheap, dollar-store pencil sharpeners.

There were some that had the blades taken out of, and some didn't. But after a few minutes of research, Alexander found out that the red part of the inhumane flag was made with a small, handheld blade, one of which someone might use for self-harm. And Alex also read blue sharpies were used, as they were untraceable.

He knew then and there. So, he stayed up till four in the morning, praying he was just over thinking. But when Lafayette entered the apartment, and he saw the Frenchman unzip his black jacket, he truly knew. There were crimson spots layering the cheap, grey t-shirt. He had a silver knife in his hand, stained with blood, and Alexander couldn't help but gasp. 

Lafayette instantly drew his eyes towards the man hiding in the darkness of their open apartment. Lafayette looked at him, and then looked down at his outfit. He glanced back up, face blank. He looked at his knife, and said, "Je suis désolé, Alex."

And the man quickly approached him, but Alexander already had the gun in his hand. He knew this would happen. The police weren't anywhere close to catching TFE, so why would Lafayette jeopardize his entire life by letting someone be a witness after the fact. 

He raised the gun with tears in his eyes and fired it three times, watching Lafayette jolt, then fall to the ground, his blood blending into the already drying one on his shirt. Alexander shook himself out of shock, staring at his dead, murderous boyfriend on the ground. He whispered, "Je suis désolé, Lafayette." with a few tears now falling from his eyes. He slowly placed the gun down on the side table and grabbed the phone, making the 911 call that would be played on countless news stations.

-

When Thomas got home early from work, he would have expected his boyfriend to be doing some reading in their bed or on their couch, maybe even editing an essay in his office. But when he saw the shorter man sitting by the closet in his office with a lot of newspapers and bracelets and photographs surrounding him, he was shocked, to say the least.

"Uh, hey darlin'. How'd your day go?" Thomas said carefully. Alexander was carefully reading an older-looking newspaper--an honest to God newspaper-- and heard the shorter man reply to him shortly and quietly in French. Thomas sat down in the desk chair and cast his gaze down towards his boyfriend, who was still intently reading.

He hummed slightly and tapped his fingers on the wooden desk. He looked around the office, it didn't look like Alexander had done much cleaning. His desk was still just as messy and nothing in the closet had been organized.

Once Alexander had put the paper down, he went to dig back in the old shoe box. Thomas cleared his throat and Alexander froze. He put the lid on the box and he fastened his gaze on the lower part of his wooden desk, not blinking. Thomas knew something was up, obviously, but he wanted Alexander to talk to him. He didn't want to force the younger man.

After a few beats of utter silence, Alexander abruptly asked, "Have you heard about the serial killer dubbed as 'The French Executioner', or TFE for short?" 

Thomas looked to the side slightly, as if recalling some previous moment. He looked at his boyfriend and said, "Yeah, actually, I have. I think I studied some of the murders and shit when I was in law school. About the motions that the lawyer tried to file, but the judge denied them." Alexander nodded but Thomas continued, "I think, if I recall correctly, he had a girlfriend at the time? And she killed him?"

The brunette laughed slightly and said, "No, Thomas. He had a boyfriend." Thomas gave him a look and said, "Okay? And? Why'd you bring him up?"

Another awkward silence went through the room. Alexander lifted the lid off the shoe box once again and pulled out a photo of him and Lafayette. He handed it to Thomas and said, "Oh. You've shown me him before. Wasn't his name like Gilbert or something?" Alexander laughed and said, "Yeah, it was."

"Was?" Thomas said and handed the photo back to him. Alexander looked at Thomas, and said, "Yeah, his name  _was_ Gilbert." Thomas simply raised an eyebrow. "He died. A little over ten years ago, he died." Thomas raised a single eyebrow but then frowned. He said, "Oh, I'm sorry, Alex." 

Alexander shrugged and went back to digging in the box, saying casually, "Oh it's fine. I was the one who killed him."

Thomas almost choked on his saliva. He coughed and said, "I'm sorry, what?!" Alexander found the white bracelet again and tossed it lightly at his boyfriend. "That was his. He was wearing it when he died. I miss him but I'm also glad I killed him." Thomas quickly put the bracelet down on the desk and shifted so he could get his phone out.

Alexander glanced up and chuckled, "Thomas, you don't have to call the cops. I did that over ten years ago." Thomas had wide eyes and said, "Can you please explain and stop being like this? Or else I will call the police." Alex rolled his eyes and said shortly, "I'm Alexis Faucette."

Thomas furrowed his brow and said softly, "Why does that--" Alexander handed him the article from the bottom of the box. He then added, "I'm the one who killed The French Executioner. I'm the boyfriend." The older male scanned through the paper quickly, getting the jist of it.

"They called me a hero, Thomas. The public praised me for killing such a horrible monster; one of the most deadly men in United States history is dead because of me. But, sometimes I wish I didn't kill him. And I don't like that they called me a hero. Because yes, he killed twenty-seven people, but I still had to deal with the loss of my boyfriend. I had to cope with the fact that I am now the reason he is dead. The public didn't understand that Laf gave me his undying love. He gave me nothing but love until his very last seconds here, and people didn't get that." Alexander ranted, and once he started, he couldn't stop.

He also couldn't stop the tears that came along with this story. "I had to move; whenever I went out, people recognized me. They thanked me and they questioned me. Always asked how I knew and I didn't know how to explain it. I just did. He had an almost unhealthy obsession with the French flag. And he had blood all over him. And he went after me. And I don't blame him for doing so..."

Thomas slid off the chair gracefully, onto the carpeted floor. He joined Alexander near the closet and glanced at the things he had taken out. Photos of Lafayette by himself and in some of them they were together, poems that were written in French and little items Thomas guessed Lafayette once owned. "What do you mean you don't blame him for going after you?"

"Lafayette-- his whole life was based around murder. It's what he did, and I've accepted that. I really have. But I do know that he loved me. NYPD wasn't anywhere close to catching TFE, no matter how much they bullshit it. Laf left nothing behind, the murders took place early in the morning, and he did them efficiently. No prints, no hair, no witnesses. I hate to admit it, but he did know what he was doing." Alexander said, wiping at his tears. "He couldn't afford to get caught then."

Thomas grabbed his hand and said, "I don't doubt that he loved you. You can tell by those photos." Alexander nodded and looked down at the photos, crying slightly again. "I had to do it." Thomas nodded this time, "I know, sweetheart."

Alex suddenly pushed all the stuff to the side and hugged Thomas once he moved slightly. The shorter man cried into his chest slightly and said, "Is it bad I miss him?" Thomas shook his head, "No darling. You're gonna be missin' him sometimes, it's natural. But if you start to really-- I hate to put it this way-- but dwell on his death, then it's bad. I mean, baby, your boyfriend died. It's going to affect you for the rest of our life, whether you like it or not."

Thomas reached back slightly, and with one arm grabbed the white bracelet. He grabbed Alex's wrist and put it on him. Thomas smiled slightly and said, "I know it's kind of bloody, but you should keep wearing it. So you always have a piece of him with you."

Alexander looked at the bracelet with red on it and looked back at his boyfriend. He said, "You sure you're okay with me wearing a bracelet with my ex-boyfriend's blood on it? And that it's there because I caused it to be so?"

He nodded, "Yeah, because that's Laf's. Keeping his knife or his sharpies, something that belongs to the TFE part of him wouldn't be too healthy." Alexander reached for the box, and he grabbed a blue sharpie from it. He held it up with a half smile on his face. 

Thomas chuckled and said, "Okay, well, how often do you go in that box?" Alexander shrugged and said, "Like, maybe once every six months?" Thomas smiled slightly, "That's fine then. Just don't obsess over that part of him. And remember that I'm here now. Don't lose what you have now because you're too busy focusing on what you had before."

**Author's Note:**

> oof i'm sorry i fuckin died for six months but im back (at least for da summer)
> 
> feel free to request. comments and kudos are greatly appreciated.


End file.
